Thursday, September 1, 2011

Brag Post: Jared

It is 11pm and I am drawing a blank as to what to actually blog about tonight. And to think I was just complimented on how impressed someone was with my blog. That was maybe a little bit too early to be said...

I don't generally like to call attention to my husband on my blog because he doesn't really like the attention being called to him. However, I want to shed a spotlight on him tonight.

Often we hear that you can never tell your children that you love them too many times. It is equally as true for spouses. I hate it when I go to bed upset with Jared and try to either let go or work through it. Over the last several months, I have put a lot of effort into really creating this close marital relationship because sometimes it can take a back burner when you have kids. I realized that I was feeling neglected and I wasn't sure if he was feeling the same way or not. Taking matters into my own hands and doing things for him helped me feel more loved.

There have been a few matters that were big deals to me but never seemed like big deals to him. With one of them, I would bring it up and we'd talk about it but no action would occur as a result. I was too scared to bring up the other issue.

We have made such a big headway recently. I've had to learn how to not get defensive when he expresses his feelings and opinions. And how to not attack when expressing mine. He had to learn to not walk away or laugh. Communication is not an easy thing to master. Ugh, I can't even say that because I'm still an amateur (um, why did the word "padawan" enter my head?). A little progress is still progress.

Jared has made many decisions that I have been so impressed with. I couldn't believe when he came downstairs earlier in the week and said "so, I was researching the caloric counts of fast food" (okay, not an exact quote but maybe a little similar). And some of the decisions he's made to NOT eat something that he normally wouldn't think twice about eating. Or we have discussions about how healthy we consider certain meals and it actually feels like he cares what I'm saying and he has something to contribute.

Or some of his decisions to help us be able to meet some of our financial goals. The biggest one is that he works two (or three or four depending on your thinking) jobs. It's a sacrifice sometimes but a good decision, nonetheless. This is the first time since we met that he's really enjoyed what he does and has very few complaints.

I still struggle with occasional feelings that my needs aren't being met but it's getting easier to take a step back and see all that we have been blessed with, all the opportunities in our lives, and all the good people and family that surrounds us. And all that my husband does for me. I am truly blessed to have him in my life and I thank God for him every day.

I don't know if he actually reads my blog posts so he may never see this, but let this be a declaration to the {extremely small part of the world that actually read this post} world. I love you, honey! I don't want to know what my life would be like without you. Some of my greatest comforts in life come from you. You support and encourage me in my.... whatever I do.... even when you don't really understand my final vision.

(This is where I insert a recent picture of the two of us--or just him. But really... that just doesn't exist.)


  1. Communication is hard sometimes. Working through the hard times is totally worth it though, because once you're past it, you're together and even closer than you were before. Isn't it great?

  2. I'll say. My husband and I just went through an extended version of that, where we were both feeling overwhelmed and undernourished, and we had to figure out how to work through it. The most interesting thing to me is how every time something hard happens, while it's happening get all frustrated and belligerent and think things like "this was such a bad idea, whose idea was this anyway? how did you let me do this? well it stinks!" and then it's all over rather quickly (in the grand scheme of things anyway) and then we're both like, "Well that wasn't so bad. And look, we've learned and grown so much! Let's remember this for next time." :P